I’m getting married soon, and everyone’s been asking who I’m marrying, lol. There are no pictures of him on my Instagram, Facebook or this website. Maybe he’s an imaginary boyfriend?
We met when we were 15. All Catholic kids have to go through 10 years of catechism classes (from primary one till you get Confirmed at 16) and we were no exception. I was actually taking classes in another church (it’s the same in Catholic churches all over the world) but I was a bit of a naughty kid and had been skipping classes for a couple of months before the teacher called my mother to ask why I had not been attending classes. She flipped, of course, as she had no idea! (Every Sunday, I would take the bus before 8am like I was going for catechism…and go hang out with my friends instead.)
My mum was so upset that I had been skipping classes (sorry, mum!) that when she bumped into a nun who used to teach her in school, she told her about it. Long story short was that she pulled me out of that church and I started classes in another catholic church.
Kids usually start and finish their entire catechism journey in one church, so joining this new bunch at 15, when everyone already knew everyone, meant I was the “new kid in school” and had to work harder to make friends. It was cool though and I was really happy in the new environment except for one thing: I remember my boy-crazy younger self complaining to a group of girls there that “there are no hot guys in this church”! One of them pointed my now-fiance out and said, “that one not bad what”. I distinctly remember saying, “ok only lah”. Haha!
We never spoke even though I was a social creature who was friends with everyone. I think it was because he was… #1, really shy and hardly ever (maybe never!) spoke and #2, not in class half the time as he was then a national athlete who had training at least twice a day, six times a week. We got Confirmed at 16 (kind of like graduation) and I never saw him again.
We bumped into each other more than ten years later, and I actually remembered him as his face hadn’t changed. Oh and he definitely remembered me! Heh. We chatted a little then and he followed up after that with a message. We ended up communicating a lot – without meeting for months.
When we finally met, I remember it was for prawn noodles in our area (we both stay in the east) and he was REALLY quiet. I was pretty bummed and slightly confused. He had asked me out but he didn’t seem interested? He had also shared quite a lot with me prior to that but why was he so silent when we finally met?
I don’t do well with mixed signals (why can’t everyone just be direct!?) and I definitely don’t take to game-playing (maybe he was trying to blow hot and cold?). I wasn’t planning to see him again. I had actually been pretty excited to meet him prior to that date and had told a friend about it. When that friend asked me how it went, I remember saying, “he was really quiet man. I think he’s not interested. I think I’m done with this one.”. This friend said maybe he was just really shy, and shy guys sometimes act like that around girls they like. He encouraged me to go out with him again.
He really did ask me out again and on account of the fact that he was obviously really keen to meet me (so confusing!)…and that I thought his dimples were cute (so shoot me, I’ve my shallow, human moments!) I decided to give him a second chance and go out with him. I remember being determined to not I get excited about it as I did the last time though – I generally hate the feeling of being played like a kite and I refuse to get sucked into hot-cold spirals.
This time though, he opened up and talked to me like the person I thought I had been communicating with the past few months. The rest is history. Well…kind of. We had struggles at the start as we are really different individuals. But still history. (I just want to say that, can!)
So he’s very much real and not my imaginary boyfriend. The reason he doesn’t show up on my social accounts is because he has requested that I don’t post pictures of him! He did agree to go to Mauritius with me for a recent shoot I did for Her World Brides magazine though – tempted by the prospect of beautifully-shot wedding pictures, no doubt. (He is Groomzilla, but more on that in another post!)
Here’s a short video of what went down behind the scenes in Mauritius:
It was such a fun trip, with wonderful people like stylist Steve, his assistant, Evon, photographer Winston and Sha, who made me look half-decent by doing my hair and makeup. It’s also the first shoot ever that I had my other half with me (I personally don’t believe in mixing work and play) and that made it extra special.
Thank you, Her World Brides, for having us!
(See the full story in the September issue of Her World Brides. It’s the one with my mug on the front!)